Thursday, July 23, 2009

Advice for Life

Today we went to a funeral of a friend from our cottage town. Alan Davenport was someone I personally didn't know very well but John's family has been connected with them for most of John's life. While I knew Alan, I didn't know him very well, I thought today that he was someone you would want to know and be associated with. From the many memories shared by people close to him it became evident to me that this was truly a remarkable and wonderful man. It also made me relive a little bit the pain of the loss of my mom and brother when I saw Alan's family grieving over the loss of such a great person. His daughter shared with everyone 4 lessons Alan had taught her and I want to share them with you.
1. Take risks in life and face it head-on. 2. Live with creativity and individualism. 3. Life in the moment and live today. Yesterday is past and tomorrow is the future, now is what matters. 4. Live with patience and live with grace.
These really resonated with me and I will let you muse over them. My brother said when he was dying that he didn't believe in a hereafter, but that people live on in the memory of those that remain. Once they are gone, you too are gone. I think this is a very good way to put it and with these 4 lessons and the memories we have of him Alan lives on. It is a very hard thing to realize that someone is truly gone and you will never see them again. I felt that, when my mom and Paul died, if only I could believe in heaven , it would help me because I would know I would see them again. At the time not being able to believe in that way filled me with anxiety and such profound sadness. Yet, 3-4 years later, I can honestly say that while I cannot see them or talk to them they are part of my every day life, an they do live on this way. It is a reassuring feeling and it my hope that Alan's family too will experience this and will find peace and comfort in that experience.


Leslie Jane Moran said...

Thank you for sharing your profound feelings Karen. Hugs. LJM

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